"I didn't even need to see it:" Thank You for Smoking

Hello everyone, and welcome to the first and inaugural installment of “I didn’t even need to see it,” a series of film reviews by a man who generally dislikes films, and doesn’t see very many of them. Fortunately, I don’t need to see them to have an opinion about them – an opinion that I will share freely in this series. So with all due anticipation, pomp and circumstance, I present: “Thank you for smoking: the honest mockumentary.” So the deep irony of this, is that I actually have seen Thank you for smoking. Twice. And I was deeply entertained – yea moved – both times. Thank you for smoking is the greatest mockumentary of all time, in my humble opinion (that’s for you, Dave), because it is what other mockumentaries are not: it is honest. As honest as Nick Naylor.
Traditional mockumentaries, such as those directed by Michael Moore, are out for blood. Their goal is to stir up anger and resentment. They essay to paint their target with a big red bull’s eye – all the while using the blackest of inks. More than making the subject of their mockery into a villain, these unfortunate films would have you believe that the object of their derision is the greatest villain of our day, to be simultaneously feared, hated, and resisted. Of course, there can’t be as many greatest villains as there are mockumentaries; or else the superlative no longer means what I think it does. The truth of the matter is, the issues presented in your standard, Moore-style mockumentary fare are not as black and white as the films themselves would have you believe. Take Bowling for Columbine, for instance. Are the actions of a few careless rednecks, or a couple hateful teenagers, justification for taking away every American’s right to own a firearm? The issues of freedom and personal accountability are not fairly addressed in Mr. Moore’s film – issues that are at the heart of the Second Amendment debate.
It is precisely the fair and honest treatment of the real issues at hand that makes Thank you for smoking a mockumentary among mockumentaries (along with a delightful statement about the high moral standards of journalism, but I’ll save that for another time). True, the film exposes big corporations to be exactly what they are: big corporations, whose goal is remarkably simple – make a profit. What did you expect? A bunch of angels sent from On High to bless the human race with their benevolence? Corporations exist to make money; and the miracle of it all is that this singular, relentless drive is responsible for the wide variety of cheap, effective, readily available products that you and I enjoy every day. If you don’t like big corporations, then stop shopping at Walmart, CostCo, Ikea, Best Buy, Home Depot, Target, The Gap, and the list goes on, and on, and on. To be perfectly honest, our economy – and with it, our unprecedented standard of living – can’t possibly do without them. Now, do I believe corporations should be allowed to pursue wealth using every imaginable scheme? Of course not. Corporations should be held responsible for the consequences of their actions. But the same goes for you, me, and every member of our sentient race. Our culture has a tendency to minimize personal responsibility, while expecting to someone to compensate us for every difficulty we face.
Thank you for Smoking explores, in a stunningly brilliant manner, the true issue at stake: accountability. We all run from it; we all want to peg it on someone else; but in the end, it’s stuck to each of us with the world’s most tenacious adhesive. Big Tobacco didn’t escape: they forced to pay over $200 billion for their poor conduct.
But the multi-billion dollar settlement seems to convince some that they are not responsible for their actions. The cries for a piece of the $276,000,000,000 pie from individuals across the country reek of entitlement and finger pointing. Apparently, one’s bad choices are grounds for a fat check these days. Too often we claim victimhood when in fact we are the culprits. As the Eagles succinctly put it, “get over it!” As Nick Naylor said, our children shouldn’t be taking advice from mass-media. If thousands of young people start smoking every year, it’s not because the tobacco companies failed to warn them of the dangers of smoking. If anyone failed to warn them, it was their parents. So let’s rejoice in a film that addresses honestly and fairly discusses an important modern issue – and leaves you thoroughly entertained. With witty dialogue, crisp acting, and many, poignant scenes, Thank you for smoking enjoys my heartfelt endorsement, and sets the standard of excellence for all would-be mockumentaries.